31 Comments
User's avatar
Invisible's avatar

This piece brings to mind the space my mother and I occupied during her dementia. Many call this death the long goodbye, but I think your words depict it more clearly for me. As always, thank you for the gift of yourself.

Duane Toops's avatar

Oh wow! I could have never even imagined it from that angle. Thank you for much for sharing something so personal and so vulnerable. I’m seeing it differently and thinking about it in whole new ways!

Susanne Helmert's avatar

Beautiful!

Duane Toops's avatar

Thank you so much Susanne!

Kay's avatar

Thank you for this, Duane.

There is such beauty in your words here.

A name for the space between absence and presence when it feels too alive to be defined?

Sometimes I have found that if I stop trying to name or define something, the truth of whatever it is, just floats up to the surface.

And then I can see right out to the edges.

And the waiting word?

I say, love.

To express love (in whatever form) outwardly. Yes. But also to allow love in.

Duane Toops's avatar

Wow! Kay! You always offer such beautiful replies and this one is no exception! There is absolutely a clarity that can emerge in the un-naming of something, in the mystery of reveling in what can’t be explained. But, the thing that hit me the most, was that very last line. Yes! That’s exactly it! Thank you!

Kay's avatar

Thank you for always writing such beautiful posts, Duane!

Duane Toops's avatar

My pleasure!

Jill McDougall's avatar

Well there you go again, Duane "I hate writing" Toops, with the most powerful words, bringing everyone to tears! ;)

Seriously, this is beautiful. And I love the pink paper with flowers, and all of the collages as usual.

Duane Toops's avatar

Jill! I told you my middle name in confidence and you’re just gonna put it out there like that?!!

Thanks Bestie! I’m glad you felt all this. Means a lot to me.

Kimberly Warner's avatar

Lovely love dogs howling into the night. “This longing you cry is the return message.”

I have a longer reply to this one:

https://unfixed.substack.com/p/in-defense-of-longing

Cesca Diebschlag's avatar

Powerful writing!! Every sentence.

Duane Toops's avatar

Thank you so much!

Manuela Thames's avatar

Love it.

Duane Toops's avatar

I love that you love it!!

Abigail Thomas's avatar

A liminal space between. Love it.

Duane Toops's avatar

Yes exactly!! Thank you!

T Van Santāna's avatar

Tibetans might call it bardo, yeah? A bardo of a sort, anyway. The space between two houses.

Duane Toops's avatar

Yes! I didn’t even think about that! Thank you! I also came so close to describing it as teh space between “words”. Thanks so much!

Bjorn Edling's avatar

”concern divided” has me going absolutely bananas 😍

Duane Toops's avatar

Wow!! Really?!! Phew I’m so relieved to hear that. If I’m being honest I was so unsure of this piece and I’m really glad to hear you like it!

Bjorn Edling's avatar

All I can think of as a response is - Nirvana put songs like ”Even in His Youth” and ”Curmudgeon” as b-sides and not proper album tracks, and that is almost as baffling to me as your doubts about this piece! 😃

Duane Toops's avatar

Holy shit! That might very well be one of teh highest compliments I could ever receive! Just Wow! Nirvana was one of teh primary catalysts for my entire creative journey. Thank you so much for this!

Bjorn Edling's avatar

That’s awesome! They are undoubtedly the most important band in my various journeys as well 😃

Duane Toops's avatar

Yes! Oh you and I are going to get along great!!

Abbey Wade's avatar

This!!! This is absolutely stunning and captures such an intensely real feeling. You can evoke such strong feelings with so little. Darn those magic hands!

I swear I can taste this, Duane. Just so perfectly put. Gorgeous❤️

Duane Toops's avatar

It’s the shape of something astonishing and otherworldly at the door. Thank you so much! ;-)

Poetry Symposium's avatar

...Is there a waiting word that calls out to the immeasurable wanting between time and space? ...

this jumps off the page

Duane Toops's avatar

Oh thank you so much! That line got revised so many times haha!

Poetry Symposium's avatar

- those always seem to need meticulous handling :)

Duane Toops's avatar

haha! Too true, there’s always that one line!