There’s something about listening to other people working alone in a studio in the same or similar field as you that helps you feel less ‘alone’ in the world.
Excellent point on "choosing silence over noise and vacuity. It's living unmasked without the fatigue of having to wear thick skin."
This is what I seek in my hikes in Nature each week. I would do it daily if I could just to be rid of the fatigue of years of living on the weekly 9-5 cubicle farm.
I know exactly what you mean! I’m still living in the weekly cubicle farm. It’s the time I spend in my studio right after work everyday, that redeems everything that happened before hand.
I can relate. While I do manage to get to my studio everyday, I usually only get about an hour and a half to two hours. I’m grateful for it to be sure, but I dream of what it would be like to be able to spend an entire day there.
Duane, I resonate with what you're saying about having the courage and humility to acknowledge—even with those closest to us—their radical otherness and the space needed for personal growth. I hope it teaches us to appreciate our differences. To ask for guidance along the path, but not to cling or grasp. To be separate—but not isolated. Contemplative—but not lonely.
Absolutely spectacular work! I am also trying to live without the facade and complicated thick skins. Step one is awareness of who are in the presence of others. Step two is course correction if need be ❤️🩹
Same here. I’m just not right without it. But, it’s also been a delicate balance, it’s so easy for me to become so dependent on it that it’s even easier for me to become detached. Always a work in progress.
This one talks to me particularly. I am continuously asking myself if I find adequate balance in solitude. Always walking on a thin line between solitude and socialisation. Thank you for this post Duane and your work is meaningful and beautiful as always!
Yes! Exactly! It really does feel a bit like a tight rope walk somedays! The realization that you really do need connection as much as you also need to be alone. It can be tricky to navigate the two.
I know so well the loss of balance between relationships and working solitude. I strugglestrugglestruggle, finding it and losing it and finding it again. This post is utterly descriptive and relatable!
Thanks so much for sharing this! I enjoyed this post. I’ve been reading a book by Richard Deeming called This Exquisite Loneliness. Deeming, also draws out an important distinction between solitude and loneliness and suggests that loneliness has nothing to do with being alone but is instead “an unshakable feeling of being invisible, immaterial to everyone around you.” That resonates profoundly with me. i have often been at my loneliest when surrounded by groups of people i feel unconnected to.
Until a bit over a decade ago, I didn’t think much about loneliness. But a very specific lack of connection struck that made no sense at the time. Still doesn’t. What Deeming says here resonates for me too, for that very specific case. I sorted the disconnect by moving away from the strange situation, but I’m still confused about it to this day. Deeming’s use of “invisible” is particularly apt, although those involved almost certainly wouldn’t see the situation the way I do. That’s why removing myself from things seemed the right move to make. And it was. 😅
I just found your work and in addition to your captivating art work I was surprised but delighted to find clarification about a topic that I have been grappling with; being an artist and wanting my solitude so that i can create but being part of a community and all it entails at the same time. Thank-you for this. I look forward to following along on your journey.
Thanks so much Barb! So glad you found your way here! It’s a topic that’s always on my mind to a greater or lesser extent. One I’m always parsing out and struggling with, for that exact reasons that you mention. I’m glad it’s not just me, glad to be in good company! thanks again!
Excellent point on "choosing silence over noise and vacuity. It's living unmasked without the fatigue of having to wear thick skin."
This is what I seek in my hikes in Nature each week. I would do it daily if I could just to be rid of the fatigue of years of living on the weekly 9-5 cubicle farm.
I know exactly what you mean! I’m still living in the weekly cubicle farm. It’s the time I spend in my studio right after work everyday, that redeems everything that happened before hand.
Daily quiet hikes . . . a dream. My goal (someday!) With my current 10-hour work days, I have to accept less frequency but deep quality.
I can relate. While I do manage to get to my studio everyday, I usually only get about an hour and a half to two hours. I’m grateful for it to be sure, but I dream of what it would be like to be able to spend an entire day there.
Duane, I resonate with what you're saying about having the courage and humility to acknowledge—even with those closest to us—their radical otherness and the space needed for personal growth. I hope it teaches us to appreciate our differences. To ask for guidance along the path, but not to cling or grasp. To be separate—but not isolated. Contemplative—but not lonely.
"To be separate—but not isolated. Contemplative—but not lonely." That's the whole balance! The entirety of the task, stated perfectly!
Absolutely spectacular work! I am also trying to live without the facade and complicated thick skins. Step one is awareness of who are in the presence of others. Step two is course correction if need be ❤️🩹
I totally agree! Thank you so much!
Wonderful words. Especially drawn to the meaning of solitude in your introductory lines. Thank you!
Thanks so much! i always appreciate your feedback!
Perfectly explained is the difficult line between the necessary solitude and the social life, so difficult to achieve.
Thank you so much! It’s definitely a fine line, one that I’m always trying to navigate carefully. Thanks again for reading!
These are such excellent thoughts!
The balance is real struggle. So hard but so necessary and true. Thanks for this!
Exactly! Such a fragile equilibrium that I'm always trying to manage and fine tune.
This resonates deeply. I need my daily dose of solitude to keep myself balanced. It is probably my favorite time of my day.
Beautifully collages!
Same here. I’m just not right without it. But, it’s also been a delicate balance, it’s so easy for me to become so dependent on it that it’s even easier for me to become detached. Always a work in progress.
This is very true for me too. It is indeed something to be aware of and work on it.
Glad to be sharing the journey, and to be amongst such great people also sharing the learning.
That first piece is so good!
Thanks so much Nolan! I appreciate it!
This one talks to me particularly. I am continuously asking myself if I find adequate balance in solitude. Always walking on a thin line between solitude and socialisation. Thank you for this post Duane and your work is meaningful and beautiful as always!
Yes! Exactly! It really does feel a bit like a tight rope walk somedays! The realization that you really do need connection as much as you also need to be alone. It can be tricky to navigate the two.
I know so well the loss of balance between relationships and working solitude. I strugglestrugglestruggle, finding it and losing it and finding it again. This post is utterly descriptive and relatable!
Well said! I’m right there with you! It’s a constant ebb and flow. Thanks so much!
Just going to casually link to this piece from earlier in the year: https://www.ongoing.network/p/solitude-remembering-and-union 🫂
Thanks so much for sharing this! I enjoyed this post. I’ve been reading a book by Richard Deeming called This Exquisite Loneliness. Deeming, also draws out an important distinction between solitude and loneliness and suggests that loneliness has nothing to do with being alone but is instead “an unshakable feeling of being invisible, immaterial to everyone around you.” That resonates profoundly with me. i have often been at my loneliest when surrounded by groups of people i feel unconnected to.
Until a bit over a decade ago, I didn’t think much about loneliness. But a very specific lack of connection struck that made no sense at the time. Still doesn’t. What Deeming says here resonates for me too, for that very specific case. I sorted the disconnect by moving away from the strange situation, but I’m still confused about it to this day. Deeming’s use of “invisible” is particularly apt, although those involved almost certainly wouldn’t see the situation the way I do. That’s why removing myself from things seemed the right move to make. And it was. 😅
Even disconnection can be healthy, beneficial, and necessary.
I just found your work and in addition to your captivating art work I was surprised but delighted to find clarification about a topic that I have been grappling with; being an artist and wanting my solitude so that i can create but being part of a community and all it entails at the same time. Thank-you for this. I look forward to following along on your journey.
Thanks so much Barb! So glad you found your way here! It’s a topic that’s always on my mind to a greater or lesser extent. One I’m always parsing out and struggling with, for that exact reasons that you mention. I’m glad it’s not just me, glad to be in good company! thanks again!
Love this so much, as a craver of solitude. And the art is gorgeous, too. Thank you for this gorgeous post!
Much appreciated! So glad you like it!
You are welcome!