This is one poked hard at the papercut I have in my finger from doing a lot of shredding of confidential information I had gathered from my day job. I sat there, feeding it into the metal jaws and wondered ‘what was the point?’ and ‘will anyone care’. That’s the kind of existential crisis I have quite regularly.
Much more productively, my papercut was poked by a thorn from the bushes in my hedge as I was planting little box plants to fill the gaps. I could see the point of that.
I started a new day job last week. Entry level. Low paying. It feels like a leap backwards in some many ways. I’ve been spending a lot of time the shredder as well. Surprising, there’s soothing about being alone in a small tucked away room, steadily shredding page after page. I appreciate the simplicity of teh task. The straightforwardness of it. A mountain of paper, slowly diminishing. Eroding rhythmically. “One must imagine Sisyphus happy”, Camus said. i think this is what he means.
But, gardening sound like a much more beautiful way to spend teh afternoon, lol.
Shredding can be soothing, I agree. I suppose it’s productive in the sense I can imagine all these slices of words being reconstituted into new sheets of paper via the recycling process. And the new users will have no idea of what lies beneath!
I went through the redundancy/entry level job cycle some years ago. I tried to see it as a breathing space, to provide some financial security while allowing me to take stock. Plus it was a temp job, so I owed the company little more than showing up and doing the job - no staff meetings for me, or, even better, no office politics! 😂
And this topic is on my mind, as I’m finishing up my reflection on my poem “meaning”. My “conclusion”, if you can call it that, is there is no intrinsic meaning, but that the meaning of existence is to make meaning. Thanks for sharing this!!
Your philosophy really moved me this morning when I read it. You’re clearly all prepared for the political time we are living in. Your thoughts on meaninglessness are so grounding at a time when insecure men are flexing their muscle against the powerless every man or woman.
I was walking down the street near my house and three tall teens wearing half masks came towards me and I stared at one in particular trying to imagine his whole face. As he passed me he shouted something which ended in …cut off your head. I burst out laughing. It’s my new go-to to defuse young people’s attempt to menace and it’s really working so far.
So thank you for the thoughts and the laughter through art in the face of darkness.
"laughter through art in the face of darkness." - Emily! This is a philosophy more stunning than anything I said! I needed this! I've struggling to find the joy and enjoyment might in my practice that was once so readily available But now you've got me wondering, what would it look like to form the fragments of discord into laughter and glue it onto the page.
Great points about meaning (or meaninglessness?) Duane. Especially for art and creating things, meaning comes and goes as it never really existed. I find something liberating in that point as well.
It reminds me of that old Zen story about carrying water and choppipng wood. Before Zen, you carry water and chop wood. You then discover Zen and try to find some deeper meaning to your actions. After Zen, it's just carry water and chop wood.
That’s exactly it, Neil! That Zen story is almost always in the back of my head, and it was at the forefront here. Dogen said that “Miracles are nothing other than fetching water and carrying firewood.” It’s that the miraculous emerges from the mundane, its that they are one and the same. When there is no ultimate meaning, you find meaning everywhere.
As an artist struggling right now with "why do i create?" and "what should I do with all these pieces of art?" your words add to my life and feel my soul. I subscribed to see your work but your words have become a powerful beacon in my existence. Thankyou .
Barb, thank you! Those are difficult questions sometimes, I’m struggling with them myself as we speak. I suppose that’s precisely what prompted this piece. I’m so glad to know that this struck a chord with you. The greatest gift that one can give of receive is the gift of feeling less alone, thanks for giving that to me!
This is one poked hard at the papercut I have in my finger from doing a lot of shredding of confidential information I had gathered from my day job. I sat there, feeding it into the metal jaws and wondered ‘what was the point?’ and ‘will anyone care’. That’s the kind of existential crisis I have quite regularly.
Much more productively, my papercut was poked by a thorn from the bushes in my hedge as I was planting little box plants to fill the gaps. I could see the point of that.
I started a new day job last week. Entry level. Low paying. It feels like a leap backwards in some many ways. I’ve been spending a lot of time the shredder as well. Surprising, there’s soothing about being alone in a small tucked away room, steadily shredding page after page. I appreciate the simplicity of teh task. The straightforwardness of it. A mountain of paper, slowly diminishing. Eroding rhythmically. “One must imagine Sisyphus happy”, Camus said. i think this is what he means.
But, gardening sound like a much more beautiful way to spend teh afternoon, lol.
Shredding can be soothing, I agree. I suppose it’s productive in the sense I can imagine all these slices of words being reconstituted into new sheets of paper via the recycling process. And the new users will have no idea of what lies beneath!
I went through the redundancy/entry level job cycle some years ago. I tried to see it as a breathing space, to provide some financial security while allowing me to take stock. Plus it was a temp job, so I owed the company little more than showing up and doing the job - no staff meetings for me, or, even better, no office politics! 😂
Makes sense. Sometimes it's really a struggle. I didn't expect the whole situation to have such a negative impact on my practice, but it really has.
Yes, I think we underestimate how wide the ripples reach, and what areas of our lives one change can impact.
Guilty as charged, lol
So powerful! Fierce and gorgeous- that IS what I feel when I read and see your creations.
Love that! Thanks Andrea! Not sure I could ask for a better reaction than that!
I love “something with a beginning”!
And this topic is on my mind, as I’m finishing up my reflection on my poem “meaning”. My “conclusion”, if you can call it that, is there is no intrinsic meaning, but that the meaning of existence is to make meaning. Thanks for sharing this!!
Thanks so much Brian! I think you summarized it better than I did! Well said!
Your philosophy really moved me this morning when I read it. You’re clearly all prepared for the political time we are living in. Your thoughts on meaninglessness are so grounding at a time when insecure men are flexing their muscle against the powerless every man or woman.
I was walking down the street near my house and three tall teens wearing half masks came towards me and I stared at one in particular trying to imagine his whole face. As he passed me he shouted something which ended in …cut off your head. I burst out laughing. It’s my new go-to to defuse young people’s attempt to menace and it’s really working so far.
So thank you for the thoughts and the laughter through art in the face of darkness.
"laughter through art in the face of darkness." - Emily! This is a philosophy more stunning than anything I said! I needed this! I've struggling to find the joy and enjoyment might in my practice that was once so readily available But now you've got me wondering, what would it look like to form the fragments of discord into laughter and glue it onto the page.
I’d like to see that!
Me too! Not even sure how to go about it, but I'm enthralled by the idea.
I'm actually going to go in another direction than your lovely comments and say that I love your cute lil astronauts where do you even find them?? 🥹
I love those lil guys too! I make the in Midjourney, print them, and then cut them up to make collages with them.
Great points about meaning (or meaninglessness?) Duane. Especially for art and creating things, meaning comes and goes as it never really existed. I find something liberating in that point as well.
It reminds me of that old Zen story about carrying water and choppipng wood. Before Zen, you carry water and chop wood. You then discover Zen and try to find some deeper meaning to your actions. After Zen, it's just carry water and chop wood.
That’s exactly it, Neil! That Zen story is almost always in the back of my head, and it was at the forefront here. Dogen said that “Miracles are nothing other than fetching water and carrying firewood.” It’s that the miraculous emerges from the mundane, its that they are one and the same. When there is no ultimate meaning, you find meaning everywhere.
As an artist struggling right now with "why do i create?" and "what should I do with all these pieces of art?" your words add to my life and feel my soul. I subscribed to see your work but your words have become a powerful beacon in my existence. Thankyou .
Barb, thank you! Those are difficult questions sometimes, I’m struggling with them myself as we speak. I suppose that’s precisely what prompted this piece. I’m so glad to know that this struck a chord with you. The greatest gift that one can give of receive is the gift of feeling less alone, thanks for giving that to me!
We appreciate you and whatever you do.
Thank you so much! That really means a lot to me!
I like the concept of 'snarling at the darkness'.
Thanks Richard! Not sure where that came from, but something about it felt right!